The Heart of TFWH
I've had a lot of questions lately about "what I am trying to do" with TFWH. To be quite honest I don't know exactly. I am putting myself out there, facing fears, and trying to allow God to use me in whatever ways He wants to use me. I am honestly just trying to be a vessel to love on, encourage, and inspire regular women like myself to live an intentional and connected life. WIth that being said, I have a LOT of dreams and visions for the future.
Chasing dreams can look different to everyone. Personally, in this phase of life, I know my ultimate goal is to raise a kind little boy and to keep my marriage healthy and to take great care of my patients at work. That can impact the world so much. Sometimes I think we overlook the impact just being kind to people has on the world. But I have also always felt like I was meant to do more on top of that. When I say this, I don't want anyone to feel bad if they don't feel this way. I think we are all blessed with different gifts, some are more behind the scenes, some are to encourage the people in your life, some are to run a loving home. Regardless of what your gifts are, they are all important. My biggest thing is I hope you are using those gifts. It can become far too easy to live your life in fear or comfort. And that is not how we are created to live. I'm not saying you have to blast your private life on social media, and do BIG things. I'm just saying, I hope you have the courage to not live in fear. Have the conversation, share your story, write a sweet encouraging letter to a friend you know is struggling, compliment a stranger. It all matters, and it all has a ripple effect, because the person you are willing to invest in will feel better, and they in return will spread that positivity to someone else. The impact of kindness and making use of the gifts you were given is lasting and so important. If you don’t think you have dreams or gifts, start with kindness. It will make an impact every single time.
I may not know exactly where the Lord is leading me with all of this, but I do know that I have spent the last year in stillness and in His word begging Him take me deeper than I would go myself, because if it was up to me I would probably just be spending all my free time after work and after my child goes to bed, hanging out and watching Netflix! Instead, I have spent hours a day before work, and after Leo has gone to bed, researching, praying, typing, listening to podcasts, hiring life coaches, having conversations with other dreamers, and I have learned so much. I have stripped my intentions down and examined every facet of them, and I KNOW my purpose is to share all the things I have learned, with women who are ready to invest and show up for themselves. I have a gift of genuinely caring for other women, connecting with them, and helping them believe in themselves. I am good at pushing people past their comfort zones and through ruts, with a mixture of love and truth. I love seeing other women improve their lives and feel genuine joy. It is my passion, and I have been told by many it is my gift. I truly believe it all begins with mindset, and if you can get the MIND, BODY, and SOUL working together you can change your life, even if your life doesn't change. I am in the process of creating a lot of really cool programs, and I KNOW the women that are willing to take part in them are going to have lasting changes in their lives. I have done these strategies and teachings with many women over the last year and the changes they have seen, and the new habits and mindset strategies they have built, are life changing. I am really really excited for these women and the improvements they have made, and I'm also excited for the future women that will show up and put in the work when I launch these programs.
Another vision for TFWH is for the blog to be a place for any woman, going through anything in life to be able to come and find encouragement and hope. I am so thankful for all the women who have shared their stories of struggle and overcoming. The stories have been so diverse, so encouraging, so real, and seeing each of these women standing with her hand in the air, signifying strength and peace after walking through the flames and hell they have gone through, brings me to tears every single time. Ask my husband, every time a picture is sent to me I ugly cry. The vision of that woman walking through the flames came to me in a moment of stillness one morning. The fact that it is somehow a reality and that women from all over the world have taken ownership of it BLOWS MY MIND. These women are brave, and amazing, and I love them all so much. If you ever feel called to share your story, reach out! Someone will benefit from it.
Another big vision I have for this community is being able to take a large percentage of what these programs make and pour the money back into the women of this community, the women who share their story, a woman who may need help paying a medical bill, or buying presents for her kid at Christmas. I realized recently that I have a heart for "regular" women. (PLEASE do not get all politically correct on me when I say "regular" women. By this I mean a woman you would see on the street and think she has a decent life, but underneath is actually struggling.) I honestly have a heart for SO MANY different populations of people, but there are so many charities set up for a lot of those populations because their struggles are obvious. Regular women get overlooked. Regular women are told they have "first world problems" and it could "always be worse" or "at least you aren't going through this". Those statements may be true, and I 100% recognize perspective is everything, but what I'm learning is regular women are hurting, and we aren't talking about it, and it is paralyzing us from fulfilling our purpose and keeping us from living effective and intentional lives of joy above our circumstances. Regular women are living lives full of comparison that is suffocating them into a life of fear. Regular women are experiencing crippling anxiety, depression from past hurts, lives of shame from past actions, and caring wayyyyy too much what other people think of them. Regular women are experiencing chronic illnesses and being blown off, or struggling with sick loved ones, or the loss of babies, infertility, eating disorders, body image, grief from loss. Just because all of these things aren't obvious in everyday life, just because these women aren't homeless or showing obvious signs of distress, doesn't mean they don't need some major love, encouragement, and guidance. I have a huge passion for “regular women” because if we can get them in a healthy mindset, believing in themselves, out of the comparison game, thriving in their homes not merely surviving, ridding their life of resentment and shame, participating in more effective relationships, together we can then go out and love on the less fortunate, and use our gifts intentionally, with passion, and with confidence. I feel like my purpose is to work through all of those things that hold us back myself, take bold steps in chasing this dream regardless of the fact that I am scared, I have fears, I have no idea what I'm doing, and then bring whoever is ready to really invest in herself, make big changes in her daily habits and mindset, along with me. I am just a "regular woman". There is nothing fancy about me. I don't really even have a working computer, and for some reason I launched a blog? I am an idiot when it comes to technology, I'm incredibly unorganized, and I know nothing about adulting and I definitely don't know anything about running a business. I don't really even love social media, but recognize it is a good way to get my message out. I'm just a regular woman that has been broken down to nothing, and am allowing God to rebuild me, and I am ALL in. I have spent hours planning, researching, praying, telling myself I'm crazy, and hiding in fear because what if it fails? What if no one cares? I've spent so much money on websites, and business classes, and coaching, all with no real clue what I am doing, like literally, NO clue. It's actually been really cool because God always speaks to me in my stillness, and I have felt His hands all over this even though I feel very incapable. For the first time in my life I feel like I am actually living my passion and my purpose out. I feel excited every morning to get out bed to create, and I want other women to feel that way as well. This will look differently for everyone, and will be on different scales for everyone, but I am excited to help the women who want to start thriving instead of surviving to take a leap, lead that book club, volunteer at that shelter, or even just recognize that you are in a season of life where pouring your soul into you family is ENOUGH and you don’t have to prove yourself further. I feel like if we can get regular women living lives of joy despite her circumstances, she will have more energy and courage to go out and love on all the other populations that need her, including and especially her family and friends.
If I’m being really honest, my dreams for TFWH go even bigger. And I wasn’t even going to add this stuff in here, but I decided to just put it all out there, because YOLO. I eventually want to have a retreat center where women can go and find healing and rest. I envision the regular women that are finishing TFWH programs finding their fire and a new energy, and going out into the community together and making a difference, big or small. I envision providing a platform for women who wouldn’t normally dream big for themselves, the tools, training and space to create their own programs on topics they are passionate about that align with TFWH mission, so they can use their life experiences to help other women. I envision buying a house in our inner city for my husbands students to go to so they have a safe space to create and dream, instead of feeling like they have to join gangs. And I want to do all of this while being a good mom, wife, and CRNA. (I love doing anesthesia, its another passion of mine, lol.) Ya’ll… I’M CRAZY. These dreams are insane. But you know what? I like it that way. I like knowing that there’s no way I could accomplish any of this on my own, that if even one piece of this gets accomplished it’s because God decided to do immeasurably more than I ever could’ve asked for or dreamt up. My dreams are BIG, and when I start thinking about how big they are I get way too overwhelmed. So for now I will start small. I will start with something I’m passionate about. Helping women create a morning routine. It’s life changing, its the only reason I even have dreams and energy, and I can’t wait to help whoever is interested get started. It will be free so watch my stories on instagram for how to sign up. (Remember the whole part about how I don’t know how to use computers…like I am not lying. Thank God for Youtube and my sister.)
So anyways, to answer the question "what exactly are you trying to do with TFWH" I would say... I HAVE NO CLUE. But God does. So I'm going to keep showing up, and keep walking by faith not by sight, and leave the rest up to Him. I'm just a regular woman wanting to help other regular women ignite the fire within themselves so they can be who they were created to be. That is my heart.